Things to Do When There's a Transit Strike
1. Watch reruns of Ellen and laugh hysterically at Justin Timberlake dancing in a gingerbread suit.
2. Eat two bowls of high fiber cereal because you don't feel like leaving your apartment in search of other food. Feel disgusting.
3. Call people "just to talk." Bestow unnecessary information about your holiday plans and why you can't get into the city to people like your professors, who really don't care at all.
4. Watch Martha Stewart make latkes with annoying children.
5. Contemplate cleaning your room and decide instead to lay around on your bed and order presents for yourself online. Contemplate what you will buy for family and friends, who you have yet to shop for. Wonder if your recent financial indiscretions have left you with enough money to even do so.
6. Briefly remember a time in your life when you would have used this extra time to "get exercise." Look down at your own body and shudder.
7. Wish that you were as crafty and resourceful as Martha Stewart. Vow to attempt at least one classy recipe over the holidays.
8. Wonder if your family will ever make it to brooklyn to pick you up and whisk you away from this striking hellhole.
9. Write a dumb blog post.
Happy Holidays?
2. Eat two bowls of high fiber cereal because you don't feel like leaving your apartment in search of other food. Feel disgusting.
3. Call people "just to talk." Bestow unnecessary information about your holiday plans and why you can't get into the city to people like your professors, who really don't care at all.
4. Watch Martha Stewart make latkes with annoying children.
5. Contemplate cleaning your room and decide instead to lay around on your bed and order presents for yourself online. Contemplate what you will buy for family and friends, who you have yet to shop for. Wonder if your recent financial indiscretions have left you with enough money to even do so.
6. Briefly remember a time in your life when you would have used this extra time to "get exercise." Look down at your own body and shudder.
7. Wish that you were as crafty and resourceful as Martha Stewart. Vow to attempt at least one classy recipe over the holidays.
8. Wonder if your family will ever make it to brooklyn to pick you up and whisk you away from this striking hellhole.
9. Write a dumb blog post.
Happy Holidays?
posted by K at 8:46 AM
1 Comments:
Things to Do in Brooklyn When You Wish You Were Dead? A-jk. All I ever say about your posts is that I larfed and larfed, but it's ALWAYS TRUE. Also, Justin Timberlake dancing in funny suits is hilarious: did you see the SNL where it's the Omeletville skit and he's wearing a giant omelet suit and dancing? It's hilarioso.
Bring it on in to Omeletville!
Post a Comment
<< Home